Jokes

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Funny and interesting things to read


Dad Jokes

A man is learning the art of origami backwards. More on this story as it unfolds
A man who took an airline to court for losing his luggage has lost his case
I didn't think the chiropractor would be able to fix my back but I stand corrected
If I had a book store, I'd make the mystery section really hard to find
Interested to know if any of my friends believe in telekinesis. Raise my hand if you do
The hardest part about buying a new boomerang is throwing the old one away

Two guys walk into a bar, the bartender walks over & another guy walks out of the bar. It's not a joke I'm just watching people walk around the bar

Puns

I can't believe it's pancake day again already. It just crêped up on me
Steven: Good evening. Stephen: Good ephening

Yo Mama

Yo Mama so broke ...
she can't even afford to pay attention
she was wearing one shoe, i said "you lost a shoe" and she said "no, i found a shoe"
she went to kfc just to lick her fingers

Yo Mama so dirty ...
her bath tub took her to court and filed a bathing suit
people gotta put a glove on to wave at her

Yo Mama so dumb ...
when she dropped out of high school she died from the fall

Yo Mama so fat ...
her favourite food is seconds
she fell in love and broke it
she got hired as a body triple
she left the house in high heels and came back in flip flops
we don't spoon, we ladle
when i pictured her in my head she broke my neck
when she signed up to myspace there was no space left
when she takes a shower her feet don't get wet
when there's a full moon she turns into a warehouse

Yo Mama so old ...
i told her to act her age and she died

Yo Mama so short ...
when she smoked weed she couldn't get high
you can see her feet in her drivers license

Yo Mama so skinny ...
her nipples touch
her pyjamas only have one stripe on them
she can look through the peep hole on the front door with both eyes

Yo Mama so ugly ...
her portraits hang themselves
monsters check under their beds to make sure she's not there

Yo Mama such a ho ...
i called her on the phone sex hotline and got an ear infection
she's been banged more times than the "i" in pixar
she's been cocked more times than john wayne's shotgun
she's had more fingers in her than a bowling ball

Yo Mama ...
breath so smelly when she walked past a clock it said "tic tac"
house is so small when she ordered a large pizza she had to eat it outside


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